I can’t stand feeling so lonely anymore. I even started watching random youtube videos to make it feel like somebody is talking to me.
I’m good on the weekends because I’m with Ricky, his friends
and high but as soon as I get home I’m depressed. I did nothing productive today. I cut myself and only laid in bed trying to fight of those nasty thoughts which make you feel like it will never be okay.
It’s going to be another horrible week without Ricky again. I’m so fucking glad that my training starts soon, I need a daily routine or I’ll go nuts.